[This account, surprisingly, is true, as told by a lawyer who saw the deposition of the brilliant worker who did this.]
Figgerin’ a bucket of rocks and cement can be used as ballast
I tied the other end of rope to me and held fast
But too many rocks I put right inside
So upwards I went sailing topwise
Whilst the overfull bucket went zooming down
To crash with a bang upon the ground
Whereby the bucket overturned and out things spilled
So now the bucket was no longer filled
Making my weight at this point be way more
So up went the bucket, and down I slammed into the floor
And when I finally with broken bones came to rest
That bucket plopped down right upon my chest
The moral of this tale I’m sure you’ll agree
is quite obvious for all to see
When picking a fight, make sure you and your opponent are evenly weighted
Or for some cracked ribs you are definitely slated.
My father always told us another Klal (generalization) about tiffs. He said, if someone starts up with you, lower yourself, even perhaps stoop down. For your enemy will come to trip over you, if you do so.
But on a real serious note, in a world that is filled with Machlokes, I just saw this amazing insight by Rabbi Elazar (Chulin Daf Pay-Tes). He teaches about the line that says: Toleh Aretz Al Be’leemah [translation: G-d hangs the world in space] that you can actually translate this differently and say the world is suspended [in existence] “Bishvil Mee She’bolaym Es Atzmoh B’Shaas HaMachlokes” for the sake of those who hold back during a fight.” You know, those who swallow and don’t asnwer back, those amazing folks…their the reason for a world to continue spinning in existence. Can you swallow your pride and try not to engage in a fight even when provoked? For the world gets hung just right when that happens.
My father also said another amazing thing – he said, “it takes only one person to decide to have Shalom, because if one person decides not to fight, no matter what, there is no fight.”